Craft beer review: BrewDog Tactical Nuclear Penguin
Hey, y’know what? I need to pop in a few more reviews here. There’s always a possibility I’ll make enough on this site that I’ll be “1099-ed,” and I figure any beers I write about can be “expensed.”
I had my taste of Tactical Nuclear Penguin a while back at Palmer Place in LaGrange. The cost of this tipple was $20, the same as for a taster of Utopias when I had it there. Considering the extra alcohol, that made it seem like a value!
Holding the glass up to my nose, I was nearly knocked off my chair by a big sweet smell of sherry and brandy. There was no foam in this pour, just a dark ruby beer that bounces off a lot of room lights. Fair enough, since they’ve probably opened and resealed the bottle a time or two already. After a few minutes of contemplation, the smell now gained notes of Bailey’s Irish Cream. I finally took that first tiny sip and fell into a bottomless pit of brown malt. At 64 proof, it’s not spurprising that the beer is full of alcohol fumes, but somehow it was not “hot” with ethanol. Just the first two sips left the inside of my mouth with a coating of malt and resin. Heck, it’s varnish and a clear coat on top, too. Even less than half of the glass turned out to be quite intoxicating. No one who doesn’t know the story of this drink would think it’s a beer. Yet it was a beer. If I could think of something to compare it to, I’d suppose a Southern Tier Krampus distilled and reduced to its barest essence. No carbonation on my tongue. Definitely more potent than any brandy. Alcoholic to the end of my tiny taste. I may never want another, but I’d wish I had some to share, so others could trip out with me.
I started writing this article with the long history and blather that you now see appendied below. But I decided to put the meat of the article up front and stick the filler in back. So for the curious, here’s the background information:
This was, of course, an opening salvo in the silly war a year or so ago to see who could make the strongeast beer in the world. For a few years, Samuel Adams Utopia’s sat atop the heap at 27% alcohol by volume. So BrewDog of Aberdeenshire, Scotland came out with this brew, at 32%. They go into a p***ing match with Schörsbrau of Germany, which put out an edition of its Schörsbock at 40%. BrewDog then put out “Sink the Bismarck” at 41%. Out comes another Schörsbock at 43%. BrewDog tries to end the argument once and for all with “The End of History,” the 55% beer issued in a controversial limited edition of 12 bottles, each stuck inside a stuffed and mounted stoat (not a squirrel, as is commonly reported). Schorschbräu offered a 57% Schörschbock called “finis coronat opus” (The end crowns the work), in a limited edition of 36 ceramic bottles and no dead animal, this past fall. But by then the interest in the contest has died down.
The deal is, after Utopias, which was made by continually feeding more yeast and fermantables to the fermenter, every beer stronger than that was made by ice distillation, freezing the fermenting beer to be able to take out water crystals, thus concentrating the beer. An acceptable practice in the style of Eisbock, though some U.S. brewers worry that one day the Gummint might rule that it’s distilling. I know the big boys have made Bud Ice, etc., but after the freezing, they actually put the water back in so it’s the same strength as their regular bilge. And don’t get me started on that 60% “beer” by the Dutch brewer ‘t Koelschip. They just added whiskey to it.
Back on the subject, both BrewDog’s Penguin and Bismarck are still in production, although the beers fetch a hefty price of up to $100 per bottle. But once in a while a local bar will buy a bottle and offer 2 oz. tastes. Which is about all anyone would want.
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